monsterfucking meme

[goatsongs]

Monsters come in all shapes and sizes. Some more humanoid than others. But even the ones that are furthest from human shape deserve love, right? They can be sexy too, in their own way.

Post your character. Note their monstrous traits (monster AUs more than welcome!) Reply to others. Get busy.

I'm not here to police how monstrous is monstrous enough, everybody just be chill and have fun.

Comments

[abnormalizes]

One dark, please! -And a whiskey for me.

[The bartender, who isn't a huge fan of rock people but is a fan of money, sends over a dark ale and a whiskey. Evangeline clinks her glass with Zelgadis' before taking a drink.]

[conglomeration]

[ Yeah he learned a long time ago that money talks. ]

Thank you.

[ Taking a long drink to stall for time. What to even say to someone under these conditions? ]

-- It's probably obvious that I'm not really used to small talk. [ Nailed it ]

[abnormalizes]

Kind of figured, yeah. I don't mind carrying a conversation. What are your hobbies?

[conglomeration]

I'm not really sure they're hobbies. Things like reading, sorcery, ancient ruins. I'm trying to find a way to undo [ gesturing at himself ] this.

[abnormalizes]

Oh... That's too bad. You should at least take some time to do something fun for yourself.

[She's not going to tell him he's wrong for wanting to undo it - it's his body, he should be comfortable with it. But spending all your time working on trying to change yourself doesn't sound very enjoyable to her.]

[conglomeration]

...I'm not great at doing anything else. I do that, and occasionally I help out some friends. A few odd jobs in between to have some money.

[ Life's missions are all encompassing like that ]

I can't say I've really tried either. Even before I looked like this, I had a singular focus. It was just different.

[abnormalizes]

Well... I'd offer to help you destress, but it would pretty transparently be me trying to get you into my bed, so.

[At least she's self-aware.]

[conglomeration]

H-how do you just say things like that with no hesitation?!

[ Someone's shy af ]

[abnormalizes]

Life's too short to be coy about what you want! Plus I get to see you make cute expressions like that, that's a bonus.

[he's SO cute]

[conglomeration]

[ HIDING WITHOUT TRYING TO LOOK LIKE HE'S HIDING ]

You don't even know if I want that sort of company or not.

[abnormalizes]

And the best way to find out is to ask.

So, how about it?

[If he says no, she will back off, she respects boundaries when they're drawn. But she does have to at least make the offer.]

[conglomeration]

[ SPUTTERING ]

I ca-- It's-- I'd hurt you!

[ and to think, he's usually so good with words ]

[abnormalizes]

I'm pretty tough! I've probably had worse, honestly.

[this is unfortunately almost definitely true.]

[conglomeration]

Good for you. [ Still blushing!! ] Unless you don't bruise or bleed I don't know how you can be casual about -- that with someone made of rocks.

[abnormalizes]

A few bruises aren't a bad thing. Gives you something to remember the encounter by. But if you're really worried about it, there's still things we could do that wouldn't be as difficult.

[conglomeration]

[ Never mind she's exactly like all the other women he knows, persistent to a fault. ]

There's a lot I'm worried about, including whether you're trying to trap me so you can experiment on me. Nothing personal, but it's happened before.

[abnormalizes]

[she resembles that remark]

That's awful! No, I'm just trying to suck your dick, no ulterior motives.

[conglomeration]

[ H-honestly!! ] You have no shame, huh? Fine, let's assume I believe you.

What do you get out of it, other than a bunch of injuries?

[abnormalizes]

It's fun? There's worse ways to spend an afternoon than blowing a hot guy and then getting myself off even if you won't fuck me outright. And you make very cute faces when you're embarrassed, so I can only imagine what you look like in bed.

[She likes to think she's very believable! It's hard to imagine anyone saying this stuff if they didn't mean it.]

[conglomeration]

[ sfkjgh for once he's glad everyone sits so far away from him, what is this conversation?. ]

I didn't say I wouldn't-- I mean, stop that!

[abnormalizes]

[Heehee.]

Do you want to talk about it somewhere more private? I can do that.

[conglomeration]

[ He's a little afraid of what she'd do in private if this is how she talks in public. ]

Persistent, aren't you?

...Fine. But don't take this as agreement. [ He's not really sure how she could possibly take it as refusal though. -- Which she should! He's totally going to refuse! Any minute now! ]

[abnormalizes]

Don't worry! I do take no for an answer. [He just hasn't actually said no yet.

She fishes her purse out and puts down enough money for both of their drinks, then stands up.]

My house is just down the street.

[conglomeration]

[ He's getting around to it, okay?! Up he stands and the mask goes on. ]

Whatever. [ If she doesn't take no for an answer, there's always a fireball. ]

Want to walk, or fly? [ It's not that he's in a hurry, it's just that he needs to be in his comfort zone for a few minutes. ]

[abnormalizes]

Walk's fine, it's basically right there.

[Indeed, it's only a couple minutes walk from the bar to her house, which is a cozy little place. Evangeline unlocks the door and leads him in, revealing that her house has tons and tons of books. Definitely an atypical number for this vague fantasy time period. Nerd.]

Make yourself comfortable.