OC voicetesting.

[accidentallich]

[A: the internet]

[The internet is a wonderful thing. It lets Gershom interact with other people without having to be covered head to toe, always fearful that he might have to flee this town just like all the others before.

Like anyone who exists on the internet, especially anyone who exists on the internet 24/7, he has a Twitter.]

What is happening on Twitter? I've been reading the Mishnah all morning, can someone explain the drama to me?

[With appropriate cat gif.]

[B: the apartment... door]
[Whatever reason you have to be outside Gershom's apartment door - selling Girl Scout cookies? Canvassing? One of his neighbors was murdered and you're a police detective who wants details? - it's definitely locked.]

Who is it? Erm, I can't answer the door, I'm very sick.

[He doesn't sound sick, but then again, a door between you and him muffles things somewhat.]

[C: the apartment]
[As one of the few people Gershom knows who knows about the lich thing, you're allowed inside. Gershom is in his cat pajamas, wringing his skeletal hands together.]

I would've changed clothes but my nice outfit has a honey stain on it - um, can I get you something? Books? Some music to put on? ...Books?

[D: wildcard]
[I don't know what I'm doing, if you know what you're doing then fuck you.]

Comments

C

[spelleton]

I just came to see you - no need to fret or try to think of things to entertain me. [ His smile is easy, his tone warm. ] Are you doing well, Gershom?

[accidentallich]

Right, of course, of course...

[No matter how many times Ekkehardt tells him he's here for his company, Gershom will never stop fretting about having him over.]

As well as ever? Nothing particularly exciting to report since your last visit. [Such is his life - if he can say that about his existence - when Ekkehardt's visits are most of his interaction in person.] What about you?

[spelleton]

Oh, nothing much. [ *Nothing he actually feels he could talk about without possibly implicitly putting Gershom in danger or worrying him too much. ] Taking more photos, mostly. I found a nice spot by the river the other day - it's nesting season down there now.

If all goes well, then in a couple of weeks I can take some pictures of ducklings for you. Do let me know if there's anything else you particularly want to see, though, and I'll try my best to find it.

[accidentallich]

[What do you mean, other liches have more dangerous lives than Gershom does? Sounds fake.

The spots of color that pass for Gershom's eyes now light up when he mentions the ducklings.] Thank you - I didn't realize it was that time of year already.

[Not that it would make a difference to him without Ekkehardt: animals don't like him. Animals that are protective of their young really don't like him.]

If it isn't too much trouble, do you think you could find a bird?

A!

[coldslither]

[The internet is great for that, isn't it? While Charlie can shed his tail for short periods of time, it's still so much easier to just live online.]

Oh man, where do I even start

Someone posted a photo of their cat dyed rainbow colors and it started a war basically

Here

[accidentallich]

That has to be Photoshopped, nu? What is there to fight about?

b

[nijistaryume]

[AU where instead of getting isekai'd, Momo got picked up by social services and a group home stands in for the IDF base? I don't know.

The voice on the other end sighs.]

Aww, okay. Are you sure you don't wanna buy some magazine subscriptions? It's a fundraiser for school.

[accidentallich]

I'd like to, but I don't think I can afford it...

[His salary shouldn't be enough to live on, except for the part where he doesn't need food or drink. It's still pretty low.]

[nijistaryume]

[The pout and slump against the door are audible.]

Sorry. I guess it's hard doing this in this end of town, but I bet the rich neighbourhoods all have the kids from their schools going around already. Do you think?

[accidentallich]

I don't know. Are there rich neighborhoods around here?

[He's... very much not connected to the outside, aside from the occasional news story on his Twitter feed. They could tear down the other apartments and he wouldn't notice.]

Let's wildcard a jamjar

[necroyalty]

[ ...Ambrosine isn't particularly pleased about being spirited off to parts unknown either, but there's certain things she's doing about it. Like actually walking around and exploring her surroundings.

And then she comes home and there's a lump under the covers of one of the beds. What the fuck.

...actually, wait, has her roommate been out at all today? ]

You're going to smother yourself like that, you know.

[accidentallich]

[Gershom is definitely not okay with this. He doesn't leave his apartment more than twice a year. He hasn't had a roommate for a thousand years, give or take. His current apartment doesn't even have windows in case Google Earth catches something - he is absolutely 100% not okay with this at all.

In this situation, the fact that he's rooming with a woman is the least of his concerns.

Muffled under the covers:] I'm fine, thank you.

[necroyalty]

You were there when I left.

Have you moved at all in the five hours since then?

[accidentallich]

...Yes.

[This is a lie. He's not a very good liar.]

b, apartment. jamjar setting

[drinkscola]

[ here's your local italian food (by which that means, it's just a pizza) delivery boy. it's not a terribly impressive job, marco's keenly aware. his hat's tugged low over his face, quashing his typically meticulously-styled hair, for exactly that reason. ... hey. it helps pay the bills: stylish fashion (when he's not dressed in this lackluster uniform), cute dates, gifts for said cute dates-- ]

[ that's a glamorous lifestyle he'd have to live up to another night. ]

Pizza! Err. This is pizza, for [ —he lifts up the receipt. it's without a name. so he reads aloud gershom's address. someone may have made a mistake here. ] —this apartment.

[accidentallich]

[Not everyone here in this place hates undead, Gershom's found, but it's hard to shake old habits of trying to hide as much as possible.]

Nu, but I didn't order any pizza...?

[drinkscola]

Oh, seriously...

[ marco sighs. ]


Would you please just, um. Take it?

[accidentallich]

[There's a long pause, before the door cracks open. A skeleton in cat-print pajamas pokes his head out.]

If it'll be a problem for you if I don't, I guess I have no choice...

B

[hattersgonnahat]

[Why was this kid here? It's a mystery. This was however, the first door to actually respond back at all.]

But aren't you answering it right now? [He doesn't sound that sick...]

[accidentallich]

If I don't open the door, you won't get sick with what I have.

[That sounds convincing, right?]

[hattersgonnahat]

What do you have? [She doesn't get sick that often from....other planet's diseases.]

[accidentallich]

...Chronic lyme.

[That sounds scary enough, right? He coughs to make it sound more convincing.]

hey gershom want to get isekaied

[nijistaryume]

[It's been a pretty bad day, from the moment Gershom was summoned to the alternate world of Iden in the country of Sengeis to the minute he was surrounded by an armed group, cautiously deemed not a threat, and taken to a safe house (not the base, they insisted, no Invader could see that save for special circumstances) so they could figure out how to send him back. He might have heard of a prophetic princess who had sent the group, the Invader Defence Force, to find him, but any mention of her would come with the notice that Princess Camiel could never be risked to get near an Invader, so she definitely wasn't coming here.

Then again, despite the simple tiara, the girl poking her head into the holding room and then cautiously walking in was a preteen in jewelry from a kids' accessory store and a shirt and jeans from modern Earth. Princess Camiel this probably wasn't.]

So... you're actually an Invader? 'Cause most of them are regular old human guys. You look more like one of Paul-san's friends.

thanks he hates it

[accidentallich]

[Gershom was cowering in fear before the people with the weapons showed up. Even now he's not entirely sure they aren't going to just kill him and be done with it. He probably wouldn't blame them if they did.

This preteen is probably not going to exorcise him, but he can't be sure.]

I-I didn't mean to invade anywhere! I don't want to hurt anyone...!

[nijistaryume]

[She looks over him critically, thinks a bit, and then stifles a giggle.]

Don't worry! Sorry if Azra-nee was a little harsh on you. [or threatened his unlife, a lot, probably] We don't get a lot of nice Invaders. So what was it for you, did you fall into a portal, get sucked into a magic book? I figure you probably didn't get hit by a car, given you're bones already.