crowspace | For ninjou.

[Oh. He's a little red.]

I'd get sick, and also I think it would be better in general if you didn't have a fever at the time.

No.

[If he gets sick, he gets sick. Dazai is half delirious right now. He wants what he wants and will have to be carefully dissuaded. Good luck.]

If you get sick, I'll take full responsibility.

[This is the most difficult mission he's ever taken.]

You'd enjoy yourself more if you weren't sick. ...I want it to be good for you.

[He clearly doesn't care and he has water on his face that is not tears, definitely not. Odasaku is right, and Dazai is half out of his mind and might not recall this all tomorrow properly but... He's stubborn.]

Make love to me. I'm serious. I don't care if I'm sick.

[Dazai is making this really difficult. 'Make love to me'... stop being romantic about it, it's his weak point.]

At least wait until I'm sure you'll remember it all later.

[Dammit. He was sure that line would work. Ugh. Being sick is the worst and he wants to kiss Odasaku and hold him and finally, finally be with him intimately because it's not right if they love each other and they don't. His logic is always broken when it comes to romance, as he's never had a decent role model for anything, let alone healthy relationships. He's been the love them and leave them type with beautiful women, needy women, every woman he felt like being with. Odasaku is so different and his body aches for him as much as his heart and mind do, and he's been trying to think of a way to bring it back up ever since that first day...]

I... don't care...

I'm not going anywhere, Dazai. I want to at least do that part right, since I messed up confessing to you.

[Odasaku's not sure what to do. He's never sure - Dazai is a walking disruption of every expectation he has.

Dazai loves him, and Odasaku loves him back, and that's why they can't do this right now, because he knows he'd regret it. Later. Later, when Dazai's well, they can do this properly.]

Well, if it's all already messed up, it doesn't matter, right?

[He looks at him for a few moments more, then closes his eyes and sighs. He doesn't know how else to express himself because he's sick and it's awful and he has no concept of how to treat people kindly other than paying them or giving them favors or... something like this. It's horrible. How does he make sure Odasaku knows he loves him?]

Right. I'm pressuring you. I shouldn't do that.

It's alright. I understand how you feel.

[It's tempting. It's really tempting.]

Please be patient. I'll make love to you when you're better, I promise.

Okay.

[He looks into his eyes and he just... melts. He's so stupid and so in love and so confused and so, so sick.]

I love you. Even though I'm sick.

I love you too.

I promised you soup when you woke up.

[He should probably go make that, but he doesn't want to leave Dazai.]

[Grinning, and then stifling a yawn.]

I might sleep more. I just wore myself out... Wake me up when it's done?

I'll do that. I hope you get better sleep this time.

[Standing up, brushing Dazai's cheek lightly as he goes.]

Okay.... okay.

[He curls back down into the pillows and pulls the sheets over his head.]

[And so Odasaku goes off to make soup, whistling as he does so.

It takes about an hour+ to make chicken soup from Actual Chicken but let's assume he's pulling out all the stops here. Odasaku returns an hour or so later with chicken soup, with vegetables and everything.]

Dazai, wake up.

[Well, Dazai looks worse, but he's sweating everything out, and that explains the appearance of a man who needs a shower and soup and tea and rest. More rest. Days of rest. He's faintly aware of how gross he is, but Odasaku's voice makes him not care. It's an angel's tone...]

Hnmf?

I brought you chicken soup.

[He sets the bowl + spoon on the bedstand.]

You should have some. Keep hydrated.

[Dazai kind of slithers up out of the covers and looks at Odasaku like nothing makes sense, then rubs at his eyes and turns his head away to cough. His hair is sticking to his forehead and he's sweated through all the bandages on his body. He's burning the hell up.]

's hot.

I'll take your temperature. [He has a thermometer around here somewhere.] You should probably change those bandages.

[Or just take them off, but he won't suggest that.]

Mmkay...

[He looks at the bandages and... shyly turns away from Odasaku to take off his shirt. He doesn't want to titillate!]

[He won't! Odasaku will be good.]

Do you want help with that again?

[A little laugh, and Dazai throws his sweat-damp shirt on the foot of the bed.]

No, they're disgusting right now. You won't want to touch them.

[That's fair.]

I could help put the new ones on.

I...

[He'll burn up with new ones on.]

I don't want to wear them. Is that okay?

As long as you're comfortable with that, I'm fine with it.

[He's not going to make Dazai burn up just so he doesn't have to see a few scars. They're just scars.]

For ninjou.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject