The Alternate Universe Meme

[misheard]

(I couldn't think of anything else appropriate off the top of my head)

The Alternate Universe Meme

1. Comment with your character.
2. Others will reply with an AU idea.
3. Thread. Profit.

AUs can be any AU of any kind, but if you need ideas, I have this masterlist and this tumblr to get you started.

Comments

[underworldescort]

Probably not.

[He answers her with a gentle smile. It'd be amusing to be written up by a high school student.]

Just to be sure - you're the deceased one, right?

[mopocalypse]

Wha--!?

[Haruka flails her arms and jumps back.]

You can see me? "Shock! Exorcist!"

[underworldescort]

[Well that sure was a reaction.]

I'm an underworld escort. I'm here to take you to where you'll move on.

...and, wouldn't you also be exorcised if there was an exorcist here?

[mopocalypse]

I thought you were one. Like, wearing a vacuum cleaner on your back and everything! Though you aren't doing that and that was just a movie that was on really late at night when I couldn't sleep, and I couldn't understand much of what was going on anyway, but they tried to think of nothing to make the ghost go away and they made it a giant mascot character stomping around instead.

[underworldescort]

[Saeki shakes his head, smiling.] I'm just an escort, not as violent as an exorcist [unless she puts up resistance]. Will you come with me?

[mopocalypse]

...[Haruka bites her lip and turns away.] Where are we going?

[underworldescort]

There's a place in the underworld where the newly dead go to be reincarnated into new lives. It's not far.

[Everything is 'not far' from the living world - that's just how the underworld works.]

[mopocalypse]

Is... is it, will it... [Deep breath.] I didn't think I'd meet a god or anything. Hahaha... especially not my grandparents' stupid blood god that family made up for their own sake! That's not real, right? You're here, you would know! It's not... It's like in the dream world, isn't it...! Tell me that first!

[underworldescort]

I haven't heard anything about a blood god existing. You'll just be meeting some underworld officials, that's all.

[The deceased one seems to be panicking a little.]

[mopocalypse]

[Haruka shakes. Thank you for not provoking her to start throwing things around in a violent rage this time. (RIP supper. RIP student council room.)]

Then, then no one's born evil or wrong... I'm not... Right? [breathes.] It's really true. No one is.

[underworldescort]

No, nobody's born that way. Even a bad person in a previous life can become a good one in the next one.

[Who'd tell someone they were born evil? That's terrible.]

[mopocalypse]

[Hic. Haruka wipes her eyes and breathes. Her voice cracks as she gives another forced laugh.]

It should have figured... But I'm glad, I think.

Did you meet everyone else who was here? Heh, they've all probably moved on too. Everyone's lived through what they really wanted.

[underworldescort]

I think my comrades have been assigned to the others. [There were a lot of them after all. One escort couldn't manage all of them.]

So, you'll come with me?

[mopocalypse]

...I guess I've stayed around long enough, huh? Promise it's going to be more fun next time? Maybe archaeologists will discover my musical talent! Yahaha.

[underworldescort]

[He can't really promise anything, but...]

That's always possible. Anything could happen in your next life.

[mopocalypse]

Hey, hey! You should totally listen! I have my phone right here, you know!

[She pulls out her 2007 slide-phone. It has buttons and everything. Haruka plugs in earphones and hands them over to the strange demon at her door, already pulling up some manner of music file.

Should he choose to listen, his ears will be assaulted with a squeaky, cacophonous mash of "experimental instrumental techno" or whatever she's calling it this week.]

[underworldescort]

[He puts the earphones in, curious, and - oh. Well then. He takes them out just as quickly.]

Ah... aha, shouldn't we be going soon?

[mopocalypse]

You didn't want to listen to my masterpiece... [Dramatic sulk. She's half-draping upon him before she springs back up again.]

Okay, okay! Too bad, I was kind of getting used to this being "the haunted dorm".

[underworldescort]

[It really wasn't a masterpiece, take it from the piano wiz.

He smiles a little, and takes her by the arm.]

I'm sure they'll remember you haunting here for quite a long time.

[mopocalypse]

[This is the girl who mistook a weepy enka song for a battle chant because she heard "magnolia" as "Mongolia".

She freezes up and flinches, but after a moment, starts to relax to the touch.]

Maybe they'll blame us for weird things even after we're gone, you know, you know?

[underworldescort]

That happens a lot. You could be held responsible for the disappearance of countless people's left socks.

[Why always one sock, anyway?]

[mopocalypse]

I'd think it would be Anego haunting the washing machine, and she'd just steal people's clothes and replace them with embarrassing ones. Yahaha.

[One last look around... please keep her from writing "Haruka was here" on the walls or spilling marbles in the hallway.]

[underworldescort]

I'll give you another look, but I can't let you cause anymore trouble. No writing on the walls.

[Even if he thinks it might be fun, if he were deceased, too.]

[mopocalypse]

[Dramatic sulk.] Even the messengers of death are no fun, no fun...

[underworldescort]

Sorry. Did you think that we would be?

[That goes against most depictions of them he's seen.]